Wednesday, July 7, 2010

How To Protect Children From Common Sense

Remember that episode from the Simpsons where Homer was asked to prepare a half-time show for the Superbowl? The one where he teamed up with Flanders and they staged the story of Noah's Ark - much to the discontent of the public? The next scene depicts an angry mother who wanted to raise her children secular humanist and who was very upset about Homer and Ned "shoving" religion down their throats. Well, her prayers (or lack of thereof) have been answered. She can now use "Godblock" - a special software that filters out religious content.
Most deeply religious people are born into their religion, but even children raised in a secular household are vulnerable to content on the web. That's why we've produced GodBlock. GodBlock is a web filter that blocks religious content. It is targeted at parents and schools who wish to protect their kids from the often violent, sexual, and psychologically harmful material in many holy texts, and from being indoctrinated into any religion before they are of the age to make such decisions.
Oh, yeah, that's just a lifesaver for concerned parents. Imagine seeing your own child falling victim to a delusion that human being is not merely a smartened ape and that 80 years - is not the end of the road. Heck, noticing your own child not getting enough sleep on his day off, because he chooses to wake up early and go to church - that alone is enough to enrage decent God-not-fearing legal parents. They can consider themselves lucky, if it's just a teenage craze that fades in a year or two... But what if the child takes it seriously?! Won't that be terrible?

Imagine - your own child choosing some stupid moral limitations (so called "purity" and "chastity" and "abstinence",) instead of following experts' advice and having all sorts of fun with women, men, or both or alone... And what if he doesn't stop there? What if he starts telling you that this unwanted thing in your girlfriend's womb is actually a baby, with a beating heart and that aborting it is nothing but killing? Or what if he completely turns his back at all your values and gets baptized?

Luckily, you have GodBlock. Now, you can be sure that your child is well protected from those scary extremist texts. Sit back, relax and watch your child growing up in a secular humanist bubble, perfectly shielded from common sense.

1 comment:

I Know Things said...

wow, godblock. what we really need is Stupidblock, to shield ourselves from the utter stupidity rampant on the internet.
good blog, thanks for posting.